Friday, October 27, 2006

Interesting site...

Check out this interesting site - Joe Apolology.com that allows people to annonymously apologize to folks, to the world, to themselves, to no one - about anything and everything!!!


JoeApology

Community - Pt. 2

OK - its been while since my last post, and my mind has been many place since then - so this may seem a bit disjointed, and I apologize in advance for that.

In my previous post I asked the question re: our American tendency to 'overplay' the community at the sake of the individual - despite the mask of individuality that we play. And while those of you who know me, may think I am not the same person - for I value and thrive in community and with others. But really, I think there is a piece missing in ourselves.

Bonhoeffer writes, "Christians too who cannot cope on their own...hope to experience help with this in the company of other people. More often than not, they are disappointed. They then blame the community for what is really their own fault. The Christian community is not a spiritual sanatorium....In reality they are not seeking community at all, but only a thrill that will allow them to forget their isolation [Vereinsamung] for a short time. It is precisely such misuse of community that creates the deadly isolation of human beings. " (pp. 81-82 - DBWE "Life Together)

Do we use community to mask our own sense of aloneness and isolation, loneliness and solitude? Why do these things scare us? God calls us first as individuals INTO community, not as community into community.

Some other quotes from Bonhoeffer that illumine this for me:

"We recognize, then, that only as we stand within the community can we be alone, and only those who are alone can live in community." (p. 83)

"Whoever cannot be alone should beware of community. Whoever cannot stand being in community should beware of being alone...The day together of Christians who live in community is accompanied by each individual's day alone. That is the way it must be." (p. 83)

I am working on a paper with this right now, and as can be seen, my thoughts are a bit jumbled and rambling right now. But I think we, especially western Christians, need to pay a bit attention to our selves. For how can we serve, if we ourselves are not well, and not healthy? Aren't we called to love others as we love ourselves? And if we don't love ourselves individually, how then are we loving others????

I would love to hear your comments, thoughts, challenges, questions....we live and grow in dialogue.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

"Community" (pt. 1)

For those of you who know me well - you know very well how much I value and treasure community. And this very idea and essence has been the focus of much study and reflection for me of late, as I returned to Bonhoeffer's "Life Together" in a class I am currently taking. But I have been taken to a 'new' place in his thoughts and certainly a new place in mine through this study, conversation and reflection, a place that is at once foreign to me - yet wholly intimate.

This 'place' is me, alone. You, alone. Each of us as individuals. For instance, think about the corporate confessions that we confess each week within our faith communities. The one that I have grown up in and through goes like this,

"Most merciful God, we confess that we are in bondage to sin and cannot free ourselves. We have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbor as ourselves. For the sake of your Son, Jesus Christ, have mercy on us. Forgive us, renew us, and lead us, so that we may delight in your will and walk in your ways, to the glory of your holy name. Amen." (Lutheran Book of Worship, p. 98. (c) 1978)

We confess here our inability or incompleteness of love for others. Or what we have or have not done for others. But we don't confess that which is most equivalent - our inability or incompleteness of love for ourselves. How can we "love our neighbor as ourselves" if we don't indeed love our own selves?

As I swim deeper into this bit, I am brought back to community and our understanding of it time and time again. I had a conversation with a friend about this very whirlpool for me the other day, and when I articulated that I am sensing this 'imbalance' and need to focus on self, she said, "Don't we in America already focus on self too much? Don't we focus on the individual at the cost of the whole?" I sat for a few minutes and said, "I am not so sure. I think that truly we mask our community as individualism. For instance when I was teaching, it was daily that I saw a young girl who was strong and spoke about being who she was, no matter what anyone said walking away from some of that in order to be seen as 'within' the group. For she knew, just as we all know, if you are not seen as "in" you have less power and position." We argued over this for sometime, and then I said, "Truly I think individualism in the US is individualism through community, with the community being seen as the individual - not the person themselves being seen as an individual person."

Now, I am not stating that we need to be about individualism, but again, for those of you that know me well, you know what I am going to say right now - I think it is about balance and/or tension. How do we live in the tension of being at once the 'individual' person that God calls us into, and the communties of 'individuals' who come together to live out the community that God has already established through Jesus Christ.

There is more running through my mind right now - and I will lay that out in the days to come, but for now I will leave it there. Kinda teetering on the 'edge' as it were - because in that teetering is a tension and a balance - both of which need to inform each other!

What are you thinking?

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

New quote for my email signature...

I love quotes that at once speak to the 'littleness' of humanity and the 'limitlessness' of the divine! And so regularly I am picking up quotes from here and there...this one I found as I was reading a website. It is quotes as "Anonymous"

"If you want to build a ship, don't herd people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work; but, rather, teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea" Anonymous

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Being...

For those who miss my poetic side, here's one that I wrote recently...

Being taken

taken as a fool

as a child

Being silenced
silenced from within

from without

Being ashamed
ashamed of action

of inaction

Being responsible
responsible for my thoughts

my deeds

Being free
free to live again

to love again


(c) 2006 - KSC

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Jesus Camp - Thoughts/Questions (with update)

I 'first' learned of this movie when a classmate/friend said to me on Friday afternoon, "Kim, you know with October being 'horror' movie month, last night I went out to see "Jesus Camp." I hadn't heard anything of this movie, so I thought it might be some 'Freddie Krueger' type movie, based at a Christian camp for something. He laughed at me, as I was a bit slow on the uptake, and told me that this was a documentary about a Christian 'boot camp' for kids. Then I remembered seeing a clip on ABC's "Good Morning America" with the camp director and a guy who was opposed to this camp.

Let's just say, after about 5 minutes, I was at once biting my tongue and praying so much for our world, for those kids, for those leaders who feel this is part of discipleship. Walking back from the theatre, my friends and I were just asking questions and calling out quotes and images that stuck in our minds. Among these were: where was the Gospel in any of this; Gospel of fear; "...that's why we use kids"; this is the image of Christianity that many across the country understand as 'normal'; who is that radio commentator?; the true spirit within those kids was overpowered by their intense fear; indoctrination; brainwashing; did I mention fear.?

Also walking back, Jessica said, "We need to make 'our' own video, and show 'another' side. That wasn't 'Christianity' but we can't make it an us vs. them issue, for Christ's love and grace is for 'them' too!" So we poked/joked about creating our own video of the day in and day out reality of a Christian community - not the Christian community, but a Christian community.

Have you seen this movie? What did you think about it, feel about it? Watch for further reflections, as we seek to bring this movie into a community conversation here within the Trinity community. Keep ya posted!

UPDATE: OK, found some websites I thought might be of some interest and information.

Jesus Camp - the movie

The Pap Attack - Ring of Fire (Mike Papantonio)

Pastor Becky Fischer

Friday, October 06, 2006

"Generous Orthodoxy" - Post-Modern/Emergent Church Convo

I have been doing much reading in the latest 'wave' of the post-modern/emergent church discussion. Brian McLaren asks some questions that just get my juices flowing, and my brain wandering. There is a small group here at sem. who are just jumping in this conversation and we are talking about the need to seek to 'enlarge' the conversation. So jump on in....Here I offer some of those prompting questions or statements from McLaren's "Generous Orthodoxy" with a few reflections of my own. What are yours?
______

in a footnote, "Sadly, some conservative Protestants unwittingly reduce the gospel to a theory of atonement. Dallas Willard calls this "the gospel of sin managment" and says it produces, "vampire Christians" who want Jesus for his blood and little else." See The Divine Conspiracy (Harper, 1998). p. 54

"Caesar's authority was symbolized in a cross on which rebels and revolutionaries suffered and failed. Jesus' authority is symbolized in a cross which he suffered as a rebel and revolutionary and succeeded." p. 91

"Salvation is what happens when we experience both judgement and forgiveness, both justice (exposing the truth about our wrong)and mercy (forgoing the negative consequences we deserve). Without both we don't end up with true salvation." p.103

"Jesus is still in the process of saving us." p. 107
The understanding that is prevalent within American society is that salvation is a one time momentary event. We often hear, "I was saved on October 2...blah, blah, blah." But Jesus is still at work in and amongst us, each and every day, each and every minute. Salvation is such a whole experience that it can't just be a 'one timer.' Yet for society, one timer things are easier to live with and 'hold' as their own personal property.

"But what about heaven and hell? you ask. Is everybody in?
My reply: Why do you consider me qualiefied to make this pronouncement? Isn't this God's business? Isn't it clear that I do not believe this is the right question for a missional Christian to ask? Can't we talk for a while about God's will being done on earth as in heave, instead of jumping to how to escape earth and get to heaven as quickly as possible? Can't we talk for a while about overthrowing and undermining every hellish stronghold in our lives in our world?" p. 122
What about our call to live in this world, and bring Christ's saving word and love to the world?

"What if Protestants switch their focus from protesting what they're against to telling the story about what they're for?" p. 140 !!!!!! YES! YES! YES!!!!!!

"Remember what Vincent Donovan said: "The day we are completely satisfied with what we have been doing; the day we have found the perfect, unchangeable system of work, the perfect answer, never in need of being corrected again, on that day we will know that we are wrong, that we have made the greatest mistake of all (Christianity Rediscovered, 146)." p. 336

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

The Mourning of a Community

Yesterday the Trinity Lutheran Seminary learned of the death of alum, Pastor Aaron Blankenhorn. I didn't know him, but in talking with some colleagues and faculty here, he was one to know. Also, in these conversations, someone sent me to his myspace.com page to see the mourning and love of a community - particularly of youth. Here is a place for all folks to voice their mourning and grief...Faith being lived out amidst the toughest of times, yet calling on the deepest of hopes. Please continue to hold Aaron's family (his wife, his young son, and infant daughter) in your prayers, as well as the faith community within which he served.

Check out his myspace.com page.

Also check out Julie's reflection on life and death and cyberspace.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

"Listening for God: A Minister's Journey Through Silence and Doubt" - Renita J. Weems

"...this is the spiritual journey, learning how to live in the meantime, between the last time you heard from God and the next time you hear from God." p. 25

"In order to find her coin, she had to sort and sweep through the clutter in her home. And that itself was as much a cause for celebration as finding the precious coin." p. 29

"We don't move on, we return wiser." p. 32

"Rituals are routines that force us to live faithfully, even when we no longer feel like being faithful. Until our heart has the time to arouse itself and find its way back to those we love, rituals make us show up for duty." p. 36

"The issue in prayer is not to pray because we are certain, but to pray because we are uncertain." p. 41

"Silence is just that - silence - a different way of getting me to listen and pay attention." p. 61

"Still, I've learned some things from this long affair with written prayers. For one thing, sometimes you have to pray the prayers you can until you can pray the prayer you want. Second, prayer is not so much learning to write or talk to someone or some presence outside yourself as becoming mindful of a conversation already taking place deep inside." p. 62

"We're never quite certain where we are headed, because arriving is not what matters. Going is what is important." p. 120

"the commission is the same, and that is to abandon everything - even the place we meant to be going. Those who wish to find themselves must first be willing to lose themselves." p. 121

"Some women wait for something
to change and nothing
does change
so they change themselves." - Audre Lorde p. 137

""Is today tomorrow?" the old woman asked no one in particular...I think of the old lady's question whenever I think I ought to be doing anything other than what I am doing at the time or ought to be somewhere other than where I am at the time." p. 150

"But labeling my failure to walk away from the church and ministry as fear is to miss the point. Attending church, preaching, officiating at the Communion table, and baptizing babies were precisely the things I had to do until belief returned." p. 161

"Rituals prove that we can be trusted to keep our appointment even when we aren't sure the other party will show up. They are done daily because the day is all there is." p. 165

"We clamor for glimpses of God as though we were actually suitable to have dealings with God." p. 173

"When God does appear, if ever God does again, it will be to leave us not with intimate knowledge about God but with a painful, exquisite insight into what it means to be human before a loving God." p. 174

"We rarely recognize what we ought to recognize at the moment we ought to recognize it." p. 185

"...for God to be in the shadows, inviting us to be vulnerable, to let down our guard, to relax, to trust the moment, is for God to be more than accessible." p. 186

"Sometimes when we're angry at God and galled at God's silence, the best we can manage to do is to confront God, confess our outrage, and risk speaking our minds." pp. 190-191

"It's in the remembering and telling of a story...that we find healing. Even inaccurate stories have the power to save us from despair." p. 194

"Put baldly: if God is not good, then why should I care that God is silent? God is probably doing me a favor and I don't even know it." p. 195

"Listening for God is just like that. It's a kind of listening that requires you to stop, be patient, stay around awhile, suffer the quiet, and learn how to listen for God speaking to us through children, through ceremonies, through cycles, through caretaking, through Communion, through cards, and through the circumstances of our lives." p. 200

From, "Engaging Technology in Theological Education" by Mary E. Hess - Chapter 1 -Rich Treasures in Clay Jars: Theological Education in Changing Times

(This is what I read for fun...some say I need a therapist! ;-))

What does it mean "to inhabit the biblical witness as a script for our participation?" p. 11

"How do we elaborate the claims, feelings, and forms of action around which Christian life revolves? Who are the learners and teachers in the process? Each and everyone of us." p. 11

"Where two or three are gathered there is indeed learning and teaching, but where the sphere extends to embrace many more, there is that much more potential for participating in deep knowing." p. 12

"We need to revitalize our congregations as communities of teaching and learning that hold at their heart the goal of truly performing the script of the biblical witness." p. 17

"Attention is one of our most precious resources in contemporary U.S. culture." p. 17

"We need to find a way to respond to the Holy Spirit's invitation to play." p. 18

Monday, October 02, 2006

"The Practicing Congregation: Imaging A New Old Church" - Diane Butler Bass

"The edge of a trend whereby religious communities focus on the meaning-making by gathering up the past and re-presenting it through both story and action in ways that help people connect with God, one another, and the world outside the doors of the church buildings." p. 4

"Custom refers to what people do, actions in accordance with precedent; tradition refers to that which accompanies the action." p. 39

"Without the chain of memory, congregations become institutional amnesiacs, lost without identity or vocation." p. 45

"Contemporary culture suffers from collective amnesia...mainline Protestant congregations have fallen victim to the larger cultural amnesia by forgetting who- and whose - they are." p. 51

"Key to fluid retraditionaing is the idea of memory, of passing on the faith." p. 53

Craig Dykstra quote - "There is in the Christian churches and in the United States as a whole, a profound spiritual hunger for something...[people] yearn for coherent, thoughtful guidance as well as fresh access to the deep veins of wisdom that at least some of them suspect are still there to be mined from historic religious traditions." p. 58

Zygmunt Bauman quote - "To be rational in the modern world meant to be a pilgrim and to live one's life as a pilgrimage. To be rational in the postmodern world means to be a vagrant or a tourist, or to act as one." p. 59

"In an age of fragmentation, it may well be the case that the vocation of congregations is to turn tourists into pilgrims - those who no longer journey aimlessly, but, rather, those who journey in God and whose lives are mapped by the grace of Christian practices." p. 60

"Narrative theology assumes that scripture tells a story, that faith communities live into and interpret that story, and that individual believers make sense and meaning in relation to theose stories." p. 96

"congregations define themselves in narrative, they communicate by narrative, and they interact with the larger world through narrative." p. 97

"Pilgrims, either an individual or group, who have journeyed into the place of imagination and risk, must be able to come home and relate the tale." p. 99

"the meaning of Christian community is found in the imaginative journey and the renewal of tradition - the pilgrimage of creating church." p. 101

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Barbara Brown Taylor (4/21/06) - Trinity Center for Spiritual Development - Portland, OR -- "Faith on the Edge"

These are just some rambling notes that I took at this lecture...what strikes you?

* oppositional identity - "id"ing ourselves by criticizing another's faith

* inside the lit center of the church the light is bright, but it is dim and dark on the outside
*People in the center keep the circle 'steady'
*People on the edge keep the circle stretched
(I will see if I can figure out how to post a picture - I I doodled for this thought soon)

* the church is conservative - it conserves the tradition and faith of the community

* no person of faith gets to skip the wilderness, the edge - to get to the center you must start at the edge

? Who Would Jesus Slap? (ponder it - it makes for some laughter and for some self-reflection)

* the church is on the cusp of a new Reformation - thus we hold onto the certain, the definite

* Wilbur says there are two functions of religion:
*translation - smoothing out, centering
*transformation - shaking up

*there is no filling the hole that was never meant to be filled - rather the hole is meant to be entered into (wilderness)

*those who are seeking the truth tend to leave less bodies behind them than those who claim to already have it

* when did we start valuing certainty higher than awe?

* faith is: not knowing a damn thing, and trusting God anyway

* is it time for us to focus on our practices instead of knowledge?
*act and let the theology follow

* trust the practice and the practice will teach you

* spiritual practices: incarnation, encounter, resistance

What am I doing here?

Welcome to my newest adventure in Blogville. I had kept a fairly consistent reflection of my internship experience in Portland, OR last year - mainly so that my family and friends back east could have a look-see. Now people keep asking me, "Why aren't you blogging any more?"

Well, I have two responses. 1. I am, just not on www.internshipinsider.blogspot.com! and 2. I don't have the 'time' during this 'last' year of formation to detail day by day. But, I am sensing a great need (ok, a bit selfish) to share reflections, quotes, quibbits, etc...that I pick up in readings for classes, conversations, conferences, lectures, etc... The added bonus of doing just that on a blog is that the conversation can grow larger - and those who know me and have been wandering through my mind on my other blogs know that I learn best in conversation.

So, that's exactly what this blog (or this blog author) is 'intending' to do. To share snippits, quibbits, sound bytes, images, quotes, etc...for the sake of conversation and community.

We are all in this, so chime on in!
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